She began to protest and said I am affecting her education and that I cannot do that. It’s Not Their Business, nosy bloody Parker’s. Marissa's father is, to be blunt, a AITA for not wearing the wedding dress my stepsister handmade for me? I (25F) got married two weeks ago. After 20 years you have kinda run that argument into the ground. Everything in your life will be dictated by mommy dearest. The dress is yours and while you may never have worn it to your wedding, you chose it and presumably had it fitted to wear to your wedding. but she picked a dress that she liked so much and said that "she always pictured her son's bride in it" mom and friends thought this line was creepy. But I don't see why you should have been buying the dress when paying for the actual wedding. Jake reached out to last week, which was weird because we are not close at all. 2. Her wedding dress had been bought and my baby never got to wear it. As the big day approached, tensions arose when I made the decision not to pay for her wedding dress. 7. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote A few months ago Olivia asked my wife if she could use the dress for her wedding and my wife gave her the dress so Olivia could get it fitted with plenty of time. My brother, who is getting married in 2024, can't get insurance for less than £300 per year and what's covered is greatly reduced. Two years ago Selena got married and although I was NTA. I have two daughters, my biological daughter Alicia (6) and my stepdaughter Marissa (14). Second prom cost about $200 (my date paid for the limo. This dress is one of the remaining and very meaningful momentos and memories you shared with your daughter. . I bought it from a small local boutique that we both love. My husband found out and told Leah. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For I finally called Anna and told her that i cannot give her my wedding dress and Anna was very upset. I might be the ah for demanfing that she pay me for a new dress just because she wore this dress once. For the NTA people out there, thanks, most of you get it. So i apologize for all mistakes in advance. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. In my opinion, it is not your obligation to pay a cent if you don’t want to. I told him that the answer would probably be no, and AITA for not allowing my daughter to dress casually at my wedding? Asshole. But the comments that made me upset made me think the most about the future and helped me empathize with my daughter. Well I bought the dress anyway since I'm the one paying for it after all. However, you're also the AH because regardless of her motives she paid for your college tuition. When it comes to weddings, emotions can run high and expectations can often clash. Signal-Return-3301. I told him that the answer would probably be no, and I paid for my best friend wedding dress when her MIL wanted to pay for it. My second wedding was a small backyard barbeque. Kate has two daughters from her previous marriage, “Selena” (29F) and “Amy” (25F). THIS SUBREDDIT IS FOR A PODCAST CALLED Reddit On Wiki, THAT READS REDDIT STORIES. ) Includes costs for nails, shoes, minimal makeup. So I posted about a month ago about my sister requesting I wear a long sleeve ankle length black dress to her lakeside wedding in summer, while being 9 months pregnant and I’ve gotten many requests to update. It was later that night when I got the idea to make her pay for another wedding dress. And buy a different dress for your daughter. All of my extended family chose to attend my daughter's wedding over my stepdaughter's. Your sister should be appreciating what you did for her and be glad she only has to pay for alterations. AITA refusing to attend my sister's wedding for excluding my stepdaughter. AITA For wearing a wedding dress to my brother's wedding? Not the A-hole. Wedding planning has so far been going alright except for few things he and I argued about like the venue and flower girl. So I booked a floor of the hotel at the wedding venue and treated my guests. I talked about it with my fiance, and he agreed that Silena should pay for the dress since he ruined the first one. Heck most fancy cocktails dresses are $200-$400. While she was in with the consultant trying on the dresses, I looked around the boutique and saw dresses with lace, full skirts, and sparkle. The oldest daughter is straight-laced and is doing the whole get married and have a traditional life. I have an identical twin sister, Lena. I have been engaged for almost six months and the wedding is happening in eight so this was the moment to start the selection of the Bridesmaid Dresses. And that's just because they were soooo publicized in the media. Me (23F) and my fiancé (25M) are having our wedding in January and my MIL has been pushing me about the wedding guest list and wants me to change my bridesmaids dresses (the colors are ocean themed) and she didn’t want them because she didn’t like the ocean but I’ve been NTA - it's plain to see OP's youngest initiated contact with her parents to get her wedding paid for. She wants to invite his mother wedding dress shopping. In my case, the situation revolved around my oldest daughter’s wedding dress. It was simple but freaking gorgeous. That number STILL comes up in conversation, so it definitely happens. AITA for not paying for my daughter's wedding when I said I would before? This dude is messy and creepy. My friend canceled a wedding once and we spent a whole day organizing a flower drop off to local hospitals, retirement homes, etc. People cross-post…. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver It’s your dress, not hers, I’m glad your mum is backing you. So i apologise for all mistakes in advance. He said that he had seen the dress before I inherited from our grandma and he wanted his fiancé to wear it to their wedding. I love my daughter to the moon and back but I don’t understand why she shouldn’t hear a no just because she’s getting married. All the outfits were supposed to be dramatic, even my brother's wife said she didn't mind if they didn't NTA. She just got out of college and started work as a teacher. Second, if she hadn't been irresponsible she wouldn't have kids to worry about and get a job to help pay for the dress. Also, they could check out high end shops for bridesmaid dresses in white/off white shades. Very nervy for someone who isnt even in your close friend circle to ask this. She even went as far as to say "this is a wedding, not a strip club I don't like it". I have gotten direct messages telling me that I am right not to give my daughter the dress because they are homophobic and think she should not be getting married. You might “respect same sex couples” but you sure as hell don’t respect your daughter. For the rest of your marriage you will always be second fiddle. My daughter is getting married in spring next year. During this dinner, my sister asked my son (17m) to make her wedding dress. 101K subscribers in the redditonwiki community. I got married in 1993, I paid $550 for my dress and a cousin did the alterations. AITA for not offering to pay after my niece accidentally ruined my sister’s wedding dress at my barbecue? So, last weekend I threw a big barbecue to celebrate my promotion. Excellent point. Finally and thirdly, she's clearly not mature mentally enough to even have a wedding. Revolutionary_Age142. And its not like he paid for it. My son has always loved design and fashion, he took technical courses in these areas and sewing, and even his friends keep asking for his clothes because they are so beautiful. She destroyed something that wasn't just sentimental to the mother, but to everyone else in the family. Well, I ended up having my baby like 3 days after making the post so I was in NTA. My daughter L and her fiancé have been planning their wedding since they were both 19. My dress is a beautiful flowy beachy dress, but not technically a wedding dress and could be ordered in color. If this was a dress you commissioned, you wouldn't pay for it if it wasn't what was agreed upon. AITA for paying for my daughters wedding but not my sons? Not the A-hole. My father's girlfriend "Stella" has a daughter, "Zoey" (21F), who is finishing her degree in fashion. Since the wedding, I wore it on a few occasions . I also paid for the bridesmaids' dresses, etc. Feb 28, 2023 · And a recent post on the AITA subreddit just might take the dress drama cake. Most assholes don’t like being called out for their bullshit. I know my daughter is just trying to be nice, but she also has a daughter. My sister “Anna” brought along her 6-year-old daughter, “Sophie. You had dreams for that dress and the future it represented. " AITA for refusing to pay for my daughter's wedding because she won't let me walk her down the aisle? I'm a 48-year-old man and my 19-year-old daughter has always been an independent thinker. She called me fatphobic and bunch of other words. It won't stop with the dress. If you’re not near those, tell her to try Poshmark, ThredUp, or Rent The Runway. I was a bridesmaid at my cousin's wedding. That's a $10k admission charge to a wedding. I took her with me and my mom and friends. Apparently, she was seeing them for the last 4 years and built a relationship behind my back. Establish the amount of $$ you are willing to provide and give her the budget. Just tell her that paying for her own gown will clear the debt she owes for your wife’s dress (she is never going to pay you anyway). And both of them wanted me to walk them down the aisle. She has always said she would love for our kids to wear her dress at their wedding. After the woman left, my SIL and I cracked up. They’ve been together for 5 yrs and I’ve never met his family. Tuesday Olivia asked me to go with her to pay some vendors, one of the stops was the tailor shop for a final fitting and pay the seamstress. His girlfriend at the time got pregnant right after they graduated high school and I practically raised their baby girl up until they both graduated college and got jobs. But for my daughter I wore the second apricot dress. I might be risking my relationship with her and my fiance by insisting on having her pay. Edit 2: I feel the need to point out OP is a woman (28F) because people are misgendering her in the reply chain to this post. Unexpectedly, my daughter sat me down and told me that she will be inviting my brother and his family(he married my cheating ex). She told me she can just up the size of it and I told her I would think My sister in law sold her wedding dress at a garage sale. $300 is steep for a bridesmaid but great for a wedding dress. I paid £100 flat rate for full coverage back in 2019 for my wedding. If you're happy to be cordial, get the alterations you need done to the dress, deduct the cost from the $900 and pay what's left back. AITA for forcing my friends to pay for my ruined wedding dress? Not the A-hole. My wife made her wedding dress with her mother. My youngest is the opposite. It took some… Yes, I get it, is her wedding and she can be mean to whoever she wants or rude, but she also should not expect support from the one guy she is doing it to. AITA for going off on my soon-to be Husband for returning my wedding dress? Not the A-hole. I just let my daughter know and now she’s upset and stressed out. Find a dress to compliment her colors. I don't know what your stepsister was thinking when she made that dress, but it's obvious she didn't listen to your wishes. Its very sentimental to her and she was very proud of it. I gave FMIL 3 days to pay me for a new wedding dress or else I the family a photo of her wearing it. AITA for refusing to pay for my daughter's wedding? Not the A-hole. She got all pissy because of it apparently, then must've told my fiance because, he came home in the evening ranting about how I made his mom upset and "turned down" her help in choosing the Reply reply. But my wife said that there's too much bad blood and I should just attend the wedding quietly for my daughter's sake. I did not want to hurt her and so I tried on the dress (even though I knew that I wanted to buy my own dress). I feel some kinda way about this. Too make a long story short my son was a teen dad. Even the son wanted to be 'part of it' and has pictures with it. I was maybe 7 years old, it's a little difficult to remember because around that age I had been to another wedding for another cousin where I had worn pink (white dress with pink flower I think. A wedding dress has such personal memories, I would even be reluctant to loan to a close friend or family member, much less, a long lost grade school acquaintance. Even if she was the right size and wouldn’t alter the dress, isn’t it odd not to respect other people’s property no matter if that English is not my first language. But I did not relent and said she's not my business now. $5,000 is a drop in the bucket compared to the amount she paid for your college. Apparently she wanted to offer it sooner, but ironically did not want to step on my mom's toes. This dress not only brought me closer to my husband, but my family too. Now this daughter not only destroyed her mother's dress, but also DIL and oldest daughters dress. ADMIN. Unfortunately, I was not able to find a dress at the boutique but I no longer need one because my fiance and I have decided to get married in court with my in-laws as witnesses. I started dating my wife Natalie two and a half years ago, and we have been married for seven months. I was pregnant. AITA For Inviting my Twin Sister Wedding Dress Shopping And Not Her Mother? Not the A-hole. I think, I need to give a background information before explaining the details. In our culture both parents are paying for the wedding, 50/50. • 8 mo. I (46M) have been married to “Kate” (48F) for over a decade. Keep looking and go determine to buy one. She places a lot of emphasis on her upcoming wedding. She was not put up for adoption, because I was the 13th baby, and she was only the 12th. AITA for not attending my step daughter’s wedding? Not the A-hole. I support my daughter, I have just been surprised and am struggling. Do not give her money. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. I [33F] was adopted shortly after birth. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. AITA for not paying for an equally extravagant wedding for my oldest daughter? Asshole. Me (f29) and my STBH (m33) are getting married soon. The only specific wedding dresses that I can actually say stand out in my memory would be Princess Diana's and Kate Middleton's. Not a straight wedding. For the reference, the dress . One man explained to the internet that when his sister got engaged last year, she asked his 17-year-old son to make OOP: I am not homophobic. I'd pay the $5,000 and write on the check - reimbursement for college tuition. There was another dress that I had been eyeing that cost a bit less, but I chose the other dress over it. My MIL has offered her wedding dress for the occassion. The dress was $12,000 which I know because I was there and if she damaged it at all o was concerned about how was going to pay. And I get it, daughter more than likely has legit reasons to not like his wife, but you still don’t give a middle finger to the person paying for it. Yeah, it's definitely because it didn't cover deposit refunds, which is the precise thing OP's daughter would have needed. Tell her anything above that is on her and her fiance. Not the A-hole. ” I apologized and thanked her for her "vision" but told her that I'd already decided on a dress that I had "envisioned" myself wearing at my wedding!. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. She never made restitution for the dress she ruined. We have 3 daughters (34, 30, 25) and 1 son (28). Subreddit Announcements Happy Anniversary, AITA! Follow the link above to learn more During this dinner, my sister asked my son (17m) to make her wedding dress. Your fiance has just shown you that he will ALWAYS pick his mom over you. She insisted to come along for wedding dress shopping. AITA for making my oldest pay back a 3,000 dollar dress she ruined. My oldest ( Bethany 16) has a step sibling ( Maria 14 almost 15). She made sure to express that to me multiple times. My MIL who is usually very sweet and nice asked me to try on her wedding dress as she wanted to gift it to me for the wedding. One aquaintence who saw it scolded her for selling it, and told how beaautiful she looked wearing it. Otherwise your daughter may not let you attend and rightly so. Your toxic sister and mother are 100% the AH. I (47M) met my wife (49F) when we were in our mid twenties. Oct 11, 2023 · The Wedding Dress Dilemma. ago. Original post:AITA for not letting my elder daughter have my younger's wedding dress? Names have been changed, I'm 55 and Amelia is 32. ADMIN MOD. Good riddance to her, doesnt sound like much of a friendship was lost there. She told me that this is bringing up lot of bad memories. He agreed, but said that he needed time and that he would need her opinion constantly. My friend Ciara (22F) was attending my wedding. They don't get to dictate when, how and how long you grieve. You put money aside for a wedding. My wife says refusing to pay is wrong and that I overreacted even though she's not been nice to me. She passed away two years ago so she will can not attend our daughters wedding that will be in 2025. I ended up attending the wedding alone and left once dinner was done. We have two daughters, Jody who is 26 and Hanna who is 28. She was a single parent. But everything you have contributed for the wedding alone is BEYOND generous. lalapocalypse. AITA for telling my MIL she doesn’t decide my wedding dress. I was so lucky to have found what I was looking for. 14 votes, 27 comments. My sister-in-law was excited to find a dress on clearance she loved for $900. She posted it thinking she was right and found out the exact opposite and now has a thorn in her ass. Make sure to tell her if that includes travel, etc for the bridal couple and family members. Step kids (USUALLY) have two living parents who pay out the butt to “share” them. I don’t know. Nta because her expectations are high and her attitude is rude. My first wedding was not at a special destination, but it was a very long drive for many of my friends and family members. aitatadad83772. This incident happened a few years ago but I was recently reminded of it and I want to take Reddit's judgment. When my daughter asked for my opinion on these dresses, I was honest. I (54f) have two daughters A (27f) and L (23f). first prom cost about $120. UPDATE: For all the YTA people out there, I've decided to give my daughter a gift in the same amount as her older sister's wedding cost. Your fiancé needed to visit a wedding shop. My sister thinks a dress isn’t worth making a bride sad. What is your daughters wedding colors. So her wedding dress size reflects that. I didn’t invite MIL wedding dress shopping because our relationship is awkward but I thought I’d show her a picture to make her feel included. AITA for telling my daughter she should change her wedding dress to green? Not the A-hole. And it's ridiculous that she would expect a 30k wedding to be paid by OP when he offered his other two 5k each. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 2) refusing to pay for the lashes, knowing that my friend might not have the funds to do it herself. •. Stop trying to call, he’s in the wrong, he needs to reach out. She should have discussed with you the budget for the dress and the wedding. Reply reply. Throwaway. Very one else is being conflict averse advising pandering to your sister. Keep the dress hidden away, and make it a hard “No, it’s my dress and it’s not up for discussion” with anyone who tries to bring it up. (2) I might be the AH because I made her a promise and I'm breaking it and might be damaging my relationship with my sister over a joke. When she and my brother got married, it was a private ceremony with 17 people including the officiant as guests. Sure, they had fancier weddings, that's because they worked for it and could afford it. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely loved the black one. This led to a heated debate within the family and left First, your cousin never asked for you to buy the dress before going to the store. My (34F) daughter (12F) has been acting uncooperative in the context of the planning process for my wedding. It means so much to me. UPDATE: AITA for not adhering to the wedding dress code. She was raised not knowing I existed, as were all of her siblings. The issue was that my daughter's wedding was happening in another state that is a 13 hour drive away. BHLDN is one example, but plenty of places make bridesmaid dresses that are fancy AF. I bet after (at most) 1 year she would file for divorce I refused and asked her to ask her "real Dad" (who refused to pay for it himself). There’s no way the red wine wave was an accident. My now-husband (27M) and I paid for most of the wedding, but my father covered a few costs for us. Tell them your answer is no, and stop pressuring you about it. I said that the dresses she picked out weren't fit for the wedding. Agree. Tessa was mortified to the point of tears and Leah reacted by calling her a “stupid little whore” and telling her to get out of her life forever. If she alters your dress to fit her, unless you're identical twins with the same body shape, she needs to pay for it to be fitted to you. Edit - NTA Adorable-Crew-Cut-92. My dress was $600 plus another $350 on alterations to customize it. When I went to prom (and I went twice, sophomore year and senior year), my first dress was 60 (loved that dress). My daughter has also agreed to figure out a way to include us in a way that doesn't involve "giving her away. Bethany and I are white while my husband and Maria are Mexican descent They have been in each other lives since they were 6 and 7 and overall the relationship is good until A family friend spent 8k on her wedding dress back in the early 90s. Opal and her fiance Jack passed away four years ago. I wanted to confront my daughter and potentially not go to the wedding at all if my wife wasn't invited. My cousin, Jake (26m), is getting married to his fiancé, Lily (25f), late next year. I’m not able to go to weddings much because I have kids, so instead I’ve been hand making crochet stuff for my friends to wear mostly small things like scrunchies, and English is not my first language. So to make a long story short, I started kinda a weird tradition in my friend group. Last night my fiancé and I are cleaning up after dinner and I received a call from the shop I ordered my dress from. My daughter came over tonight and apologized for ignoring me, and explained that she had always thought she had been promised she could have the dress to own rather than borrow, so she was sad to have lost that dream. I thought the dress was somewhat creepy and AITA for not wanting to crochet my friends entire wedding dress for free! Not the A-hole. My brother and his wife planned a winter wonderland wedding, everyone was supposed to be dressed in either silver, white or light blue to fit the theme. Both of them are engaged to two wonderful men who we adore. She accused me of loving Becca more. We aren’t rich and don’t care that much about weddings, so I wore my prom dress to my wedding. She wants to get into the wedding dress mookday233. NTA. My husband and I have two daughters, Opal and Amelia. My second dress was free (my cousin gave it to me. It’s not a super fancy dress or anything, it’s basically a long sequin dress in deep dark blue with one sleeve. She can use this for whatever she wants. Bethany and I are white while my husband and Maria are Mexican descent They have been in each other lives since they were 6 and 7 and overall the relationship is good until None of them screamed "bride" to me. AITA-throw-wedding. I have been in our daughters' (26F) life for 22 years. The fact your step daughter wants to change it is completely out of line. Between her loans and a relatively low salary, she doesn’t have very much money to pay for her wedding. If I didn't feel so strongly about the dress I would give it to her simply to spite them. My SIL (F23) just got engaged recently, and is in a similar situation with her wedding. My parents were kind enough to buy my wedding dress as a gift to me (around $2000) and I insisted on paying alterations (around $400). First by thinking a dress can ruin a wedding (celebrating a union with her life partner who she loves should be the focus), and Second by the aforementioned snobbery/greed. She said that she always pictured herself wearing the family wedding dress on her wedding. Tell Dad and Stepmom that it was YOUR wedding and you decide what you do or don't wear. If you can sink 200k on a wedding for your step daughter, you are worth so much more than this BS. I raised her to be independent and think for herself, which I've always appreciated. My job was to hold the train, having to go to the bathroom but couldn't and I think I wore a white dress. If she wants a blow out wedding, she can pay for it. So a few years ago me and N (my then fiance) got engaged. That he’s trying to control your money…nope. Now my daughter wants to wear the dress and I told her it wouldn’t be a good idea since she won’t be able to squeeze into it. My wife and I have saved roughly $50k for each daughter as a wedding fund. Don’t let your folks push you into paying to keep the peace, what My 28 yr old daughter is getting married next year. Yes! My wedding dress looks exactly like every other puffy sleeved monstrosity from the mid-90's. We have a daughter “Lynn” (12F) together. Now we've been arguing about my wedding dress, This might sound The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver I was incredibly disappointed. (1) I backed out of paying for my sister's wedding dress over a joke she made. Basically I’ve been planning a day with my bridal party and mom to go try on wedding dresses for the first time. Your sister for making a demand to pay for half of her dress. Another option would be to loan the dress for the wedding with the condition that after the wedding, the dress is returned to OP and re-adjusted to her body at the sister's cost. OP can oversee the adjustments so no irreversible changes are done to the dress. It was a joyous occasion with friends and family, and everyone was in high spirits. At the time they started planning it A and her now fiancé had a lot of money and bought L a wedding dress worth hundred of thosands of dollars. Otherwise-Cycle-2441. NTA OMG You need to put a MAJOR stop to this marriage. kt xm od hx rk gv vh oh fg ka